How To Deal with a Perfectionist: 5 Examples and Tips
Perfectionists are all around us and their unsolicited advice can wear us down. Think, for example, about those people that keep commenting about which work suits us most, how we should parent our children, how we should dress, or how we should clean our house. Why is it that the perfectionists in our lives can affect our wellbeing? And, how can we manage the perfectionists that surround us? Today we will find out.
If you’re reading this article, chances are you like animals, correct? If you not only like animals, and dogs specifically, you might also have a pet yourself or have grown up around pets. If so, you also probably know that pets have some skills that allow them to provide us with an immense amount of support, love, and above all - acceptance. And, if you’re following our content here at Antiloneliness, you might recognize these topics as part of therapy as well. Well, you’re not the only one.
The workplaces can be extremely competitive and stress-provoking environments. Long working hours, strict deadlines, difficult conversations with bosses and managers can be hard sometimes. Also, the amount of information you are bombarded with can increase your anxiety levels and can make you feel overwhelmed and disconnected from the present time. The tricky part of this bad habit is that it can easily turn into a vicious cycle. The moment you start feeling anxious, you disconnect from the present time and start focusing on future tasks or past mistakes at the workplace. In the end, it causes more anxiety, provokes stress and might cause burnout. In the long run, it can affect both your mental and physiological health. So, it is important to deal with your stress level adaptively and decrease anxiety. What can you do about this?
This is where mindfulness comes in.
The Stress Cycle: How To Manage Stress The Right Way
We have all been through stressful periods in our lives. For example, moving to a new country, changing jobs, or breaking up with a partner. We are all acquainted with the feeling of stress and know a couple of things about how to manage it. The problem is that we have come to believe that once we are done with a stressful experience, that’s it; we are done and do not need to do anything else. This can't be farther from the truth so today we will explore what psychologists know about managing stress the right way. We will discuss what the stress cycle is and why is it so important to complete it.
Are Perfectionists Truly Confident? The Perfectionism Paradox
When we meet a perfectionist we oftentimes see the image of a perfect person that is confident and has everything figured out. We tend to think that they are very successful, that they have their life together and are under control. Unfortunately, if you delve deeper into the mind of a perfectionist, you will soon realize that this is not true. Today we will uncover the paradox of perfectionism. Whether you are eager to learn more about perfectionism or you are a perfectionist yourself, I hope this article provides you with some valuable insights.
What is People-Pleasing & Why Is It So Difficult To Stop?
We all know a people-pleaser. These sorts of people can be very kind, helpful, and all around enjoyable to share time with. However, what lurks below the surface are deeply self-sabotaging tendencies that can harm the mental health of the pleasers. If you are a people-pleaser, chances are that you have tried to change your habits and mindset to no avail. Why is it that it is so difficult to stop people-pleasing? And, how is it that something so seemingly positive as pleasing others can become harmful? Let's find out.
Workaholism 101: Common Symptoms, Causes and Tips
When someone asks how can they stop overworking, what they often hear is to 'simply work less or set some boundaries'. Evidently, this can help but it is not as easy and straightforward as it sounds. The truth is that there are some deeper reasons to why it is so difficult to stop being a workaholic. For instance, we might know that stopping working on a project at five is reasonable. But, we might still be compelled to work well into the night. Why is it that some of us seem addicted to work? And, how can we overcome this?
Imagine your best friend going through a tough period in their life: they just got fired from their dream job, and they believe they are completely incapable of anything. “I am so useless and stupid! I cannot do anything right!”, they tell you. And now think: how would you react? You likely see yourself rushing to your friend’s side: you comfort them, support them. You tell them that many people feel this way after losing their job. You try to reassure them and tell them that they are being too harsh on themselves. But now imagine that this “best friend” is you. Would you do the same to yourself?
We would probably all like to imagine doing the same for ourselves, but the reality is usually a little bit different than that. Many of us find it easier to be there for others than to be there for ourselves when times are tough: it feels easier and more acceptable for us to be compassionate to others than to show that compassion for ourselves. But what is self-compassion anyways?
Is Perfection Possible? Tips to Overcome Perfectionism
As perfectionists, we tend to think that perfection is in fact something that is attainable and feasible. However, life is not that simple. The idea of perfection might just be something that solely exists in our heads, and this idea is ever-changing. One day we might think that perfection means getting our dream job, but when we actually get this job, it might not be what we wished for. So, we change our goals, and once again try to strive for this abstract concept of perfection. And, the never-ending strive for perfection continues. So, let's back up and ask ourselves: is perfection even possible? And, if it is not, then why do we try so hard to achieve it?
We all think negatively. We all have moments where the world is not fair and everything is against us. However, when we allow ourselves to do it too often, things can go downhill.
Negative thinking patterns are commonly described by unrealistic assumptions, self-criticisms and denial of the truth. Such a thinking pattern changes the way we view the world. It changes our attitude towards past, present and future events. A negative thinking pattern can impact more than just ourselves; our health, ambitions, family, etc. The effects of such thinking can have large effects for anyone, especially when it continues into a chronic, negative, spiralling thinking pattern.
The gut feeling Is your gut following you or are you following your gut?
When was the last time you had this gut feeling about something? Did you listen to it or did you dismiss it? My guess is that quite a few people know what it is like to have a gut feeling but then decide to "rationalise it away" with logic. Given what we know about how our brain developed differently from other species - it may seem like the "logical" thing to do, right?
Perfectionism and the Inner Critic: Two Sides of the Same Coin?
Have you ever heard that annoying, little voice inside you telling you that you are not good enough? Have you ever finished your workday but decided to keep working because your results did not yet meet your high expectations? These are two examples of that voice inside us that push us hard and can lead us to the brink of exhaustion. It is the result of the combination of our inner critic and our perfectionistic tendencies. But, how are these two seemingly different concepts related to each other? Today we will find out.
On Healthy Anger: Why Do We Suppress This Normal Emotion?
Our society has a complex relationship with anger. On the one hand, we frown upon it and equate it to violent outbursts and harmful behaviors. On the other hand, it is an entirely normal emotion that we all feel at some time or another.
So, why is it that most of us have decided that this supremely common emotion should be suppressed and locked inside our minds? Why are we afraid of expressing anger and processing it as we do with any other emotion? Today we will delve into the world of anger and discover how suppressing it can be harmful to our mental health and relationships. We will also discuss how to begin your journey towards accepting anger and expressing it in a healthy and productive way.
What Does It Mean To Be Triggered? + 6 Self-Soothing Activities
In day-to-day conversations, and especially on social media, you may have encountered people saying how they “got triggered” by seeing, reading, or hearing something. However, what is exactly the meaning of that phrase?
In everyday use, “getting triggered” is usually used to describe feelings of discomfort, annoyance, or disagreement with content the person has come across. However, psychologically speaking, the phrase has a deeper and more complex meaning.
What is Learned Helplessness and How Can We Overcome It?
There once was a young boy who loved the circus. At the circus, he was particularly fascinated by the elephants. At the end of the elephant show, he went to where the animals were kept and saw all animals in cages. All except one. The elephant.
Despite being the largest animal at the circus, the elephant was tied to a stump with a comparatively small rope. The little boy wondered to himself why the elephant would not just break free and run away. It clearly could with very little effort!
What is Toxic Shame and How Can We Heal From It
In life, all of us have done some things wrong. And made many mistakes. Too many to count. Some may have happened in moments of recklessness and impulsivity. Others may have happened even after careful planning. No matter how your mistakes happened, you probably ended up feeling many different emotions, including emotions like guilt and shame.
Why Do We Procrastinate? The Real Reasons + How To Stop
Have you ever started working on an important project and suddenly found yourself cleaning the house?
Just like in a “trance”, you magically stop working on your work project and puff! you are preparing your clothes for your dinner party, but it is only 10.00 in the morning. While you are “focusing” on cleaning the house, preparing your clothes and scrolling on Instagram, you just realised it is already the end of the day and you can’t start working on a new thing because it is important and “needs time”.
Why are We Afraid to Fail? The Role of Trauma in Fear of Failure
How Do I Know I Need Therapy? 8 Signs It's Time
“You’d better see a therapist”
Often used as an insult or a joke, this phrase is used far too often with a negative connotation. BUT thinking you need therapy is nothing to be ashamed of. Therapy is a safe, collaborative and comforting space aimed at supporting and encouraging growth.
A night of bad sleep can be one of the most annoying things in life. Tossing and turning. Wondering about how many hours we will be able to sleep this night. Worrying about the day to come. All these are frustrating and overly common experiences that millions of people struggle with every night.
In this article, we introduce some helpful techniques and tips grounded on science that will help you improve your sleep and achieve a healthy night’s rest.
Are you experiencing burnout and find yourself often forgetting small and big things? For example, you walk to the kitchen and then stop and wonder “what did I want to do here?” Or, do you sometimes forget what you did the day before, with who you were, or what did you talk about? If this resonates with you, here you can learn how does burnout impact your brain and memory.
Burnout recovery is not always a linear process. It takes time and commitment to overcome burnout symptoms and we need to patiently grant our body and mind the sufficient time to heal. When we are struggling with burnout, we might wonder how long does it take to recover, and how much time needs to pass before we return to our old, happy self. In this article we explain how long does it take to overcome burnout and three important factors to take into account.
Burnout is becoming an increasingly problematic illness in our fast-paced world. In order to learn how to identify, prevent, and manage burnout, we must first begin at the source. We must learn what triggers burnout and when exactly does it begin. Is it when you start losing sleep or when you feel stressed every day? In reality, burnout starts way earlier than that and the answer might surprise you.
Perfectionism can be exhausting. Constantly trying to attain these greater-than-life expectations we have placed on ourselves can be quite tiring. And, yes, we are the ones that have placed these expectations on ourselves, most people around us do not expect as much from us.
However, these feelings and expectations stem from somewhere. Perhaps people in our past did expect as much from us. So, who expected so much from us? What is the root of perfectionism? And, if it is something that we learned, is it possible to unlearn it?
TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE.