Is Perfectionism Bad? 5 Things Perfectionists Struggle With
Perfectionism is often hailed as a desirable trait in our society—after all, who does not want to be perfect? However, the reality is that perfectionism can actually be a double-edged sword, causing a host of challenges and struggles for those who embody it. From the fear of failure to the inability to rest and the constant striving for unattainable standards, perfectionists often find themselves battling a number of internal demons that can leave them feeling exhausted, alone, and unfulfilled. In this article, we will explore five of the most common challenges that perfectionists face, and offer tips and strategies for overcoming them.
Are You a Perfectionist? 6 Common Signs of Perfectionism
Have you ever been asked in a job interview the dreaded question "what is your weakness?" If so, you might have responded with the common answer of being a perfectionist. While many people see perfectionism as a positive trait, we will explore in this blog post that it is not always as beneficial as we once believed. In fact, perfectionism can be linked to a variety of mental health struggles, including anxiety, depression, burnout, eating disorders, and relationship issues. By examining what perfectionism is and identifying common signs of perfectionism, we hope to bring more awareness to the negative impact it can have on our lives.
What is Imposter Syndrome? 7 Common Signs and Causes
Did you know that many successful individuals, including Michelle Obama, Tom Hanks, and Maya Angelou, have admitted to struggling with imposter syndrome? Despite their remarkable achievements, these prominent figures have still experienced the same inner turmoil as many of us. In fact, Maya Angelou, who wrote 11 books, described how she sometimes feels anxious and worries about being exposed as a fraud. It may be difficult to believe that such accomplished individuals would suffer from imposter syndrome, but the truth is that anyone can experience it.
In this blog post, we will delve into the topic of imposter syndrome, exploring what it is, common signs of it, and what causes it. So, if you have ever felt like a fraud or worried that you are not good enough despite your achievements, this post is for you.
How To Build Self-Kindness: 4 Best Exercises and Tips
You know that little voice in your head? The one that tells you that you are not doing good enough and won’t amount to anything. The one that tells you that you are the only one who doesn’t know what they are doing? Basically, that little voice that tells you that you are just not good enough and a failure. I have got a voice like that too. I like to call it my inner critic.
Most, if not all of us, are more unkind to ourselves than those around us. Can you imagine saying things like “you are not good enough” to those around you? If we did, I doubt we would have anyone be okay with such statements, let alone stick around. So why is it that we are so harsh with ourselves? And, how can we become our very own friends? Let's find out!
The Stress Cycle: How To Manage Stress The Right Way
We have all been through stressful periods in our lives. For example, moving to a new country, changing jobs, or breaking up with a partner. We are all acquainted with the feeling of stress and know a couple of things about how to manage it. The problem is that we have come to believe that once we are done with a stressful experience, that’s it; we are done and do not need to do anything else. This can't be farther from the truth so today we will explore what psychologists know about managing stress the right way. We will discuss what the stress cycle is and why is it so important to complete it.
Are Perfectionists Truly Confident? The Perfectionism Paradox
When we meet a perfectionist we oftentimes see the image of a perfect person that is confident and has everything figured out. We tend to think that they are very successful, that they have their life together and are under control. Unfortunately, if you delve deeper into the mind of a perfectionist, you will soon realize that this is not true. Today we will uncover the paradox of perfectionism. Whether you are eager to learn more about perfectionism or you are a perfectionist yourself, I hope this article provides you with some valuable insights.
Workaholism 101: Common Symptoms, Causes and Tips
When someone asks how can they stop overworking, what they often hear is to 'simply work less or set some boundaries'. Evidently, this can help but it is not as easy and straightforward as it sounds. The truth is that there are some deeper reasons to why it is so difficult to stop being a workaholic. For instance, we might know that stopping working on a project at five is reasonable. But, we might still be compelled to work well into the night. Why is it that some of us seem addicted to work? And, how can we overcome this?
Imagine your best friend going through a tough period in their life: they just got fired from their dream job, and they believe they are completely incapable of anything. “I am so useless and stupid! I cannot do anything right!”, they tell you. And now think: how would you react? You likely see yourself rushing to your friend’s side: you comfort them, support them. You tell them that many people feel this way after losing their job. You try to reassure them and tell them that they are being too harsh on themselves. But now imagine that this “best friend” is you. Would you do the same to yourself?
We would probably all like to imagine doing the same for ourselves, but the reality is usually a little bit different than that. Many of us find it easier to be there for others than to be there for ourselves when times are tough: it feels easier and more acceptable for us to be compassionate to others than to show that compassion for ourselves. But what is self-compassion anyways?
Is Perfection Possible? Tips to Overcome Perfectionism
As perfectionists, we tend to think that perfection is in fact something that is attainable and feasible. However, life is not that simple. The idea of perfection might just be something that solely exists in our heads, and this idea is ever-changing. One day we might think that perfection means getting our dream job, but when we actually get this job, it might not be what we wished for. So, we change our goals, and once again try to strive for this abstract concept of perfection. And, the never-ending strive for perfection continues. So, let's back up and ask ourselves: is perfection even possible? And, if it is not, then why do we try so hard to achieve it?
Perfectionism can be exhausting. Constantly trying to attain these greater-than-life expectations we have placed on ourselves can be quite tiring. And, yes, we are the ones that have placed these expectations on ourselves, most people around us do not expect as much from us.
However, these feelings and expectations stem from somewhere. Perhaps people in our past did expect as much from us. So, who expected so much from us? What is the root of perfectionism? And, if it is something that we learned, is it possible to unlearn it?
Feeling lonely is not the same as being alone.
You can be among other people, your partner, your family and still feel lonely. You can be all by yourself and yet, not feel lonely at all. Contrariwise, you can feel in peace, connected, calm, joyful, satisfied with your life, you name it. So, what is loneliness then?
Fear of failure can be one of the most self-sabotaging, crippling feelings we can experience.
But why does it have such a powerful impact on us that it can make us stop chasing our dreams, avoid starting new relationships and be hyper-vigilant all the time?
How can we allow fear to exert such control over our lives and, most importantly, how can we overcome this fear?
How many times have you thought that you wish you had more time in your hands so that you can follow your dreams? Or, that you wish your life would be different and you could distribute your time better so you can follow your passion?
If you have asked yourself these questions and you have noticed a pattern of regret and "stuckness" coming up interestingly often, there is a high chance that you might be standing in your own way. You might be sabotaging yourself subconsciously with some specific behaviors and actions.
9 ways that perfectionism can lead to burnout
First of all, let’s clear out a really common misunderstanding.
We believe that perfectionism is a healthy mindset that leads to perfect results, perfect achievements, perfect life, to perfection.
However, the truth is somewhat different: perfectionism is the stress we feel in order to be perceived as perfect by others or ourselves and the exhausting effort we put in order to deal with that stress.
In other words, perfectionism feels like we are not enough and we need to try more in order to become so. And when we say “try”, we mean try a lot.
The Pros and Cons of Being a Perfectionist
As we wrote in our previous article ‘How Much of a Perfectionist are you?’, perfectionists tend to feel that nothing they ever do is good enough; that they need to work unrelentingly in a bid to better themselves, or else there’ll be negative consequences. If a perfectionist feels he/she is not meeting the high standards they hold for themselves, they will often experience distress or inner unrest which can affect negatively their mood or result in anxiety.
With this description perfectionism sounds like a really unpleasant, unwanted trait. So why do so many of us personify it? Well, as behavioural psychology tells us, everything we do is done because we believe it will be of benefit to us (or it has benefitted us somehow in the past) - and perfectionism is no different. The perfectionistic thoughts described above breed by definition an intense drive to perform well, and their continued presence in our lives can be put down to the successes and external validation (who doesn’t love compliments?!) this increased drive once brought us.
How Much of a Perfectionist Are You?
How much of a Perfectionist are you?
Defeating anxiety, stress, negative thoughts, procrastination and fears has never been easy. And it never will be. Not because there is something wrong with us, or because we are doing it the wrong way, but because it is something that indeed requires from us conscious effort, time, practice and a lot of mental energy.
We are actually rewiring our brain: changing the neuron paths existing since childhood which take us a certain way, into a different path, where things happen in a different way and are linked to different thoughts.
How Do You Know If You Made The Right Choice?
We don’t know and we can never be sure of if we made a right decision. But letting go of the perfectionist inside us and accepting these facts can bring us solace.
This is a story, a pattern which comes up very frequently when discussing with people: we all want to know whether we made the right decision or not. Or we are struggling hard in order to be 100% sure that we will make the right decision in a given upcoming conflicting situation.
TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE.